Hayward runs Sloan Out of Town
A somber day in Salt Lake City has turned into mayhem after Joseph Smith’s favorite coach, Jerry Sloan, called a press conference to let a fragile world know that he will be stepping down from his position as the longest-tenured coach in the National Basketball Association. As the general of one of the most successful professional basketball teams of the past 25 years, Sloan racked up win after win for teams that usually had no business having more points than its opposition as the final horn sounded. Hot Rod Hundley would let us know about John Stockton’s gaudy assist totals, Karl Malone’s usual 30 points, and Greg Ostertag doing his best to keep the game from getting too exciting.
Various media have reported different spins but this insider has gathered the following crucial pillars to this colossal story:
During a private workout, Sloan’s staff pitted Hayward against other potential NBA draftees, as per usual. Now that the Utah coach is no longer active, this insider feels confident in revealing the team’s ‘secret’ when it comes to evaluation of prospects. Gordon Hayward was pitted against Wesley Johnson in a heated game of mini Nerf basketball when Johnson went up for a critical block with the score tied at 5. However, the block was an obvious goaltending violation. Hayward called the violation and Sloan loved the heady play of his soon-to-be lottery pick, reaching over the other 29 teams that had assumed he would go undrafted to pluck him from Butler.
-According to a Jazz beat writer, Gordon Hayward feels insulted by the organization because, as a lottery pick and college superstar, he feels that he should be a featured part of the offense. As quoted by the player himself, “I got us to the national championship last year so… you figure it out.
- Hayward is being sued by a woman who claims a bejeweled pendant she bought for $5 at a garage sale was taken from her after Hayward and up to eight others trapped her in an Akron, Ohio, home, TMZ.com reports. The woman, 19-year-old Vaneisha Robinson, was previously a suspect in the theft of the $10,000 pendant, which features Hayward's moniker "Ole Dirty Gordon" and his jersey number. Robinson claims that after Hayward found out she had the pendant, he arranged a meeting at an Akron home. Hayward would then make Robinson an offer for the pendant. Instead, Robinson alleges it was all a set-up to have the pendant forcefully taken from her. She says Hayward was never present at the house, but 8-9 others were. TMZ reports that Robinson's suit alleges the group kept her in the house against her will until she'd hand over the pendant. She is suing for $500,000 in damages.
What we are not above is telling the truth. We will not be bullied by Gordon Hayward or Mormons.
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